The worst thing in Cataclysm—and WoW
Last night, I had the terrible misfortune to experience the worst thing not only in the Cataclysm expansion but in World of Warcraft in general.
It’s located here, in the Twilight Highlands, at the Crucible of Carnage. I refer, of course, to the Crucible of Carnage.
I was invited to participate not knowing what CoC was, but hoping at least it wasn’t PvP. No, it wasn’t that, and for that I was grateful. I was summoned to the edge of the Twilight Highlands and then flew to the destination, a large pit for fighting with a rickety platform overlooking it.
On that platform was Gurgthock, the quest giver for the Crucible of Carnage. And that’s where the trouble began.
The first problem
To begin the Crucible of Carnage, one merely has to click Gurgthock then accept his quest. The problem is that there is no phasing involved with the fight so with a hundred other people trying to get the quest at the same time, it’s a ridiculous click race to see who can get it first.
Inexplicably, if you’re in a party not everyone in the party will get the quest—but some will. You should expect everyone to see “Abethany is starting a quest, would you like to begin it as well?” We’ve seen that dialogue many times before. Why is it absent here? Why do some, but not others, get the quest?
I took it upon myself to camp next to Gurgthock and participate in the click race verses the zillion other people there. I successfully got the quest once, but for some reason no one else got it. As a result, I was one monster “ahead” of the entire rest of the party.
Which meant that we all had to do every monster twice. That is until something happened and we had to do one monster thrice.
There are multiple monsters in the event and each one must be defeated in turn. In another inexplicable turn of events, each monster is a separate quest. So the click race has to be done repeatedly throughout the event.
Worse, you have to be at the pit floor to defeat the monsters, but Gurgthock is on a platform above you. There is no way to kill the monster and get to Gurgthock to initiate the next monster before someone else gets the quest and fights a different monster.
Therefore, there’s nothing to do between fights. Unless you would like to help out—but don’t!
One of our party decided to help another group. The idea was that the sooner the other group finishes with their monster, the sooner we can proceed to our next monster.
Unfortunately, the group he was helping had no healer, or at least didn’t heal him, so he died. When the monster died and the other group’s quest completed, all zillion of us on the platform clickraced. I was the lucky winner and got the quest.
Except, of course, for the dead guy who didn’t get it. Thus, again, some of us were ahead and others behind in the progression so we had to repeat monsters. Again.
The fights themselves are uninteresting, except for one notable exception. In the exception, the villain picks up and carries a carriage with his bare hands then throws it at someone. Keen! The rest of the fights? I don’t remember them at all. At least from a DPS perspective there was nothing else to do but press 1 until dead.
I don’t think it would be too embarrassing to say that during one of the fights I texted during the combat, keeping one hand on my mouse to pew pew. That’s the level of DPS challenge one may expect from CoC.
This quest needs to be phased, have one quest cover all the opponents, and when one person in the party starts the event everyone in the party should be in the same event, not a separate one, and the fights should be more interesting in at least some manner. If one opponent can have something interesting, memorable, and new to do, why can’t the others?
As it is now CoC is a terrible, ugly chore poorly implemented. Instead of being fun it’s rage inducing. I haven’t been as frustrated just physically playing the game before last night. We’ve all been in frustrating boss fights and something that’s been buggy and not working properly—but CoC appears to be working as intended (except everyone not being on the same monster might be a bug, maybe?) and it’s still the worst thing ever.
I did get a nice staff as a reward, the “Very Manly Staff.” That’s great, except I’m a girl.